Event Horizon

Event Horizon

MV5BYTM1ZTk0ZDgtNmI1ZS00MjI3LTgyYWEtMWNiNDY5MThmMGRkL2ltYWdlXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyNTAyODkwOQ@@._V1_SY1000_SX664_AL_.jpg

The Polterguides took a ride on the Event Horizon. We talk about the interesting marketing choices that doomed the movie to failure, the weird dystopian future with really ugly underwear, inappropriate use of surgical equipment as weaponry, and whether or not Cooper is in the wrong movie.

 

IMDB Synopsis

 

Director: Paul W.S. Anderson (as Paul Anderson)

Writer: Philip Eisner

Released: 1997


Quote: Where we’re going, we don’t need eyes.

Poll: Do you think they made it out? Are they safe?

Rule: Be Cooper. If you’re gonna be anybody, be Cooper.

 

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee?

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Buchanan.

Some parts of it are used under a creative commons license:
Designed by Freepik
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
http://www.supercoloring.com/silhouettes/log-cabin

Our music was modified from Dementia by Decomentarium and is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution License.
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

 

#beyondthecabininthewoods  #beyondthecabin  #horror, #horrorfan, #horrorfilms, #horrormovies, #horrorfanatic, #horrorjunkie, #currentlywatching, #ilovehorror, #horrorlove, #horrorfamily, #horrorgeek, #horrornerd, #horroraddict #horrorlife, #horrorfreak, #horrorclub, #AdreanMessmer, #DonnaLeahey, #KenziWhala ,#debbiebuchanan, #SnarkCasts #gumbiecatnetwork

It (2017)

It (2017)

Here there be spoilers!

it-poster-are-released-ahead.jpg

This film, based on Stephen King’s book of the same name, speaks for itself. The acting, especially on the part of the kids, is amazing. We loved this film.

IMDB Synopsis

For the I Am D.B. synopsis, check Insta!

Directed by: Andy Muschietti

Written by: Chase Palmer, Cary Fukunaga, Gary Dauberman

Based on the novel by Stephen King

Released: 2017


Quote: Go blow your dad, you mullet-wearing asshole!

Poll: What would It show you?

Rule: Don’t take anything from someone in a place it is physically impossible to get to.

 

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Buchanan.

Some parts of it are used under a creative commons license:
Designed by Freepik
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
http://www.supercoloring.com/silhouettes/log-cabin

Our music was modified from Dementia by Decomentarium and is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution License.
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

 

#beyondthecabininthewoods  #beyondthecabin  #horror, #horrorfan, #horrorfilms, #horrormovies, #horrorfanatic, #horrorjunkie, #currentlywatching, #ilovehorror, #horrorlove, #horrorfamily, #horrorgeek, #horrornerd, #horroraddict #horrorlife, #horrorfreak, #horrorclub, #AdreanMessmer, #DonnaLeahey, #KenziWhala ,#debbiebuchanan, #SnarkCasts #gumbiecatnetwork

Dawn of the Dead (2004)

Dawn of the Dead (2004)

Boy, did we have a great time talking about this remake of the 1978 classic, Dawn of the Dead.

Dawn_of_the_Dead_poster.jpg

The soundtrack, the writing, the acting, the cast, whether CJ deserved redemption, whether Luda knew what was happening, the relationship between Kenneth and Andy, survival instinct, and the importance of the dog’s survival.

This is a long one, folks, and we had a lot to say.

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Zack Snyder

Written by: James Gunn, George A Romero

Released: 2004


Quote: Say something!

Polls:   Would you have let the people in the truck in?

            Could you kill someone who had been bitten but was not yet dead?

            Should they have left the mall?

Rule: Stick to the plan!

 

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Buchanan.

Some parts of it are used under a creative commons license:
Designed by Freepik
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
http://www.supercoloring.com/silhouettes/log-cabin

Our music was modified from Dementia by Decomentarium and is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution License.
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

 

#beyondthecabininthewoods  #beyondthecabin  #horror, #horrorfan, #horrorfilms, #horrormovies, #horrorfanatic, #horrorjunkie, #currentlywatching, #ilovehorror, #horrorlove, #horrorfamily, #horrorgeek, #horrornerd, #horroraddict #horrorlife, #horrorfreak, #horrorclub, #AdreanMessmer, #DonnaLeahey, #KenziWhala ,#debbiebuchanan, #SnarkCasts #gumbiecatnetwork

XX

XX

XX is an anthology horror film featuring stories about women directed by women. Your polterguides found it entertaining, if a bit frustrating here and there. We discuss Donna’s strong feelings about Jack Ketchum, Adrean’s strong feelings about selecting someone who doesn’t like horror to write and direct a horror story, Debbie’s approving feelings about the depiction of depression and Kenzi’s strong feelings about retelling Rosemary’s baby,

Not to mention all our strong feelings about the surprisingly touching story of the little stop motion creepy doll.

Give the movie a watch. It’s entertaining, even if we feel that “women” isn’t really a theme.

 

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Roxanne Benjamin, Karyn Kusama, St. Vincent, Jovanka Vuckovic

Written by: Jack Ketchum, Jovanka Vuckovic, Roxanne Benjamin, St. Vincent, Roxanne Benjamin, Karyn Kusama

Released: 2017


Quote: The Birthday Party, or, The Memory Lucy Suppressed from Her Seventh Birthday That Wasn't Really Her Mom's Fault (Even Though Her Therapist Says It's Probably Why She Fears Intimacy).

Rules:

The Box: Don’t look in the box.

The Birthday Party: The Weekend at Bernie’s scheme never works.

Don’t Fall: Don’t trust the gas station attendant when looking for a campsite

Her Only Living Son (or What if Charles Grodin' s character from Rosemary's Baby had lived): If your child is the son of the devil, maybe don't wait till he's 18 to do something about that.

 

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Buchanan.

Some parts of it are used under a creative commons license:
Designed by Freepik
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
http://www.supercoloring.com/silhouettes/log-cabin

Our music was modified from Dementia by Decomentarium and is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution License.
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

 

#beyondthecabininthewoods

 #beyondthecabin

 #horror, #horrorfan, #horrorfilms, #horrormovies, #horrorfanatic, #horrorjunkie, #currentlywatching, #ilovehorror, #horrorlove, #horrorfamily, #horrorgeek, #horrornerd, #horroraddict #horrorlife, #horrorfreak, #horrorclub, #AdreanMessmer, #DonnaLeahey, #KenziWhala ,#debbiebuchanan, #SnarkCasts #gumbiecatnetwork

The Omen

The Omen

With Polterguide Kenzi away, we brought in polterguest Rob who suggested the 1976 iconic movie, The Omen.

We discuss super cuddly, friendly happy-panting hellhounds, Gregory Peck’s unbreakably stoic expression, how long the evil nanny would have still had a job if she worked for us,  whether Damien is actually evil, and the 2nd Doctor’s turn as a doomed priest.

 

Quote: Don’t let him kill me!

Poll: Would you have adopted that child?

Rule: Don’t lie to your wife. Or your husband. Or your spouse in general. Or your significant other.

Rob's kickstarter for Ruined My Rhythm, vol 2

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Richard Donner 

Written by: David Seltzer

Released: 1976


Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Buchanan.

Some parts of it are used under a creative commons license:
Designed by Freepik
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
http://www.supercoloring.com/silhouettes/log-cabin

Our music was modified from Dementia by Decomentarium and is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution License.
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

 

#beyondthecabininthewoods

 #beyondthecabin

 #horror, #horrorfan, #horrorfilms, #horrormovies, #horrorfanatic, #horrorjunkie, #currentlywatching, #ilovehorror, #horrorlove, #horrorfamily, #horrorgeek, #horrornerd, #horroraddict #horrorlife, #horrorfreak, #horrorclub, #AdreanMessmer, #DonnaLeahey, #KenziWhala ,#debbiebuchanan, #SnarkCasts #gumbiecatnetwork

 

Poltergeist

Poltergeist

What happens when you take a group of polterguides who haven’t seen each other for over a month, sit them down in front of one of their favorite nostalgic horror flicks, and then highly caffeinate them?

This podcast!

We talk fast, we talk long, and we talk hard. Rumors of who really directed, the Poltergeist “curse,” how old Diane must’ve been when Dana was born, that clown, that tree, that piece of meat, cat-calling, proper storage of your stash (not scattered across your bedspread), that orange jersey, keeping track of your kids, and more.

Guys, we really enjoy this movie.

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Tobe Hooper

Written by: Steven Spielberg, Michael Grais, Mark Victor

Released: 1982


Quote: You moved the cemetery, but you left the bodies, didn't you? You son of a bitch, you left the bodies and you only moved the headstones! You only moved the headstones!

Poll: Would you have approached that crawling steak on the counter?

Rule: Don’t sleep with the television on.

 

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Buchanan.

Some parts of it are used under a creative commons license:
Designed by Freepik
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
http://www.supercoloring.com/silhouettes/log-cabin

Our music was modified from Dementia by Decomentarium and is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution License.
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

 

#beyondthecabininthewoods  #beyondthecabin  #horror, #horrorfan, #horrorfilms, #horrormovies, #horrorfanatic, #horrorjunkie, #currentlywatching, #ilovehorror, #horrorlove, #horrorfamily, #horrorgeek, #horrornerd, #horroraddict #horrorlife, #horrorfreak, #horrorclub, #AdreanMessmer, #DonnaLeahey, #KenziWhala ,#debbiebuchanan, #SnarkCasts #gumbiecatnetwork

Friday the 13th (1980)

Friday the 13th (1980)

It's 12:15 in the morning. We just watched our 4th horror movie in 10 hours. We're sleepy, yet surprisingly coherent. Also, this movie made Debbie yell a cuss very loudly.

Our fourth episode in Beyond the Cabin the Woods in an actual cabin in the woods marathon. The 1980 classic Friday the 13th was one of the original slasher flix, and it shows in its pacing and execution. A young Kevin Bacon appears in a speedo, the “jester” character displays culturally insensitive behavior, the final girl (whose name we just couldn’t remember because the most interesting character was killed in the first 10 minutes) battles for her life.

Then… we turned off the mic and went to sleep. *yawn*

 

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Sean S. Cunningham    

Written by: Victor Miller, story by Sean S. Cunningham and Victor Miller, Ron Kurtz (uncredited)

Released: 1980


Quote: We ain’t gonna stand for no weirdness out here.

Poll: If all the locals tell you “here lies death,” would you still go to the camp?

Rule: Don’t go out in the woods barefoot and wearing only your undies. Put on some pants and shoes!

 

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Buchanan.

Some parts of it are used under a creative commons license:
Designed by Freepik
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
http://www.supercoloring.com/silhouettes/log-cabin

Our music was modified from Dementia by Decomentarium and is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution License.
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

 

#beyondthecabininthewoods  #beyondthecabin  #horror, #horrorfan, #horrorfilms, #horrormovies, #horrorfanatic, #horrorjunkie, #currentlywatching, #ilovehorror, #horrorlove, #horrorfamily, #horrorgeek, #horrornerd, #horroraddict #horrorlife, #horrorfreak, #horrorclub, #AdreanMessmer, #DonnaLeahey, #KenziWhala ,#debbiebuchanan, #SnarkCasts #gumbiecatnetwork

Evil Dead (2013)

Evil Dead (2013)

Cabins and Chainsaws Suite #3

Evil Dead (2013)

Your polterguides are on hour seven and horror movie number three while staying in an actual Cabin in the Woods (with wind and rain and darkness and strange scratchy noises coming from the front door. It was super creepy, y’all).

This gore-fest of a film remade Sam Raimi’s original Evil Dead with a lot of nods to the original while still going off on its own creepy, body-horror way and giving us the occasional surprise.

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Fede Alvarez

Written by: Fede Alvarez & Rodo Sayagues, based on Sam Raimi’s Evil Dead.

Released: 2013


Quote: She just cut off her fucking arm! Does that sound “fine?”

Poll: Would you be able to cut off your arm?
         Would you read the book?

Rule: Don’t say it. Don’t write it. Don’t hear it.

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Buchanan.

Some parts of it are used under a creative commons license:
Designed by Freepik
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
http://www.supercoloring.com/silhouettes/log-cabin

Our music was modified from Dementia by Decomentarium and is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution License.
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

 

#beyondthecabininthewoods  #beyondthecabin  #horror, #horrorfan, #horrorfilms, #horrormovies, #horrorfanatic, #horrorjunkie, #currentlywatching, #ilovehorror, #horrorlove, #horrorfamily, #horrorgeek, #horrornerd, #horroraddict #horrorlife, #horrorfreak, #horrorclub, #AdreanMessmer, #DonnaLeahey, #KenziWhala ,#debbiebuchanan, #SnarkCasts #GUMBIECATNETWORKS

Tucker and Dale vs Evil

Cabins and Chainsaws suite #2

Your polterguides survived their ordeal in the cabin (...or did we?) and watched Tucker and Dale vs Evil.

Then we talked about a lot of things: growing up in the country, dad lawn-mowing techniques, things not to put on your animals' wounds, seeking medical attention after loss of consciousnesss, towns in Oklahoma, and, sometimes, we talked about Tucker and Dale vs Evil.



Alan Tudyk voice over video

 

Tucker and Dale vs Evil
Director: Eli Craig
Writers: Eli Craig, Morgan Jurgenson

Quote: We’re having a doozy of a day.

Poll: If a guy who looked like Dale walked over to you holding a scythe, would you have talked to him?

Rule: Call the police.

Evil Dead 2

Your polterguides trekked out into the woods and spent the night in a cabin watching scary movies and listening to scary wind noises.

First up, Sam Raimi’s camp classic, Evil Dead 2. This “requel” (Bruce Campbell’s word) to Evil Dead, shows fan favorite Ash Williams battling the forces of evil in a remote cabin. Part campy comedy, part body horror, this film leads into the final movie of this “trilogy,” Army of Darkness.

Name: Evil Dead 2: Dead by Dawn
Director: Sam Raimi
Written by: Sam Raimi and Scott Spiegel
Year of release: 1987

Quote: We just cut up our girlfriend with a chainsaw. Does that sound “fine?”

Rule: Don’t run towards the guy in the cabin shooting at you.

Poll: Young Bruce or old Bruce?